I wish I had something of actuality to say. I don't that's the issue with this blog. I have nothing to say. I dislike talking blindly to an "audience." I'm not a habitual journal keeper. Anything I have to say to myself I say, there is no "hashing it out on paper. " I prefer imagery. I was an obsessive scrapbooker as a kid. Now I collect everything.

I often think of things I'd like to say in a blog entry, but then when it comes down to it, it seems pointless. Consequently, I have several unfinished, unposted "entries" hiding in the wings. I've thought about it on and off and I keep coming back to the thought that it has quite a bit to do with my personal feelings on privacy and how much of myself I reveal to the "outside world." Oh the Irony! A girl posting nude photos of herself on the internet and bemoaning the lack of substance in her own blog based on a fear of exposing herself! And why is that? Phooey is what I say. Maybe 2009 will be a me get over myself year?

Maybe I'll start telling stories again.

Once again: All images are copy write Life Is Great Images
with editing attempts by myself.

Life is Great

It really is. Especially when I get to work with photographers like Steve. His motto for his photographic adventures matches my own attitude: "If we're not having fun, we're doing something wrong."


After posing for Rob/ Nihilus a bit back in VA then moving out here, I thought that was the end of playing nude in front of a camera. I had tons of ideas and fanciful notions about shoots, but no serious modeling thoughts. I don't so much want to model as I want to play. That's what this is for me, playtime. This doesn't mean I don't want to/won't play hard and dirty. That said I prefer to "work" only with photographers who share this sentiment. Life Is Great Images definitely does. We first talked about working on some experiments with underwater nudes months before we could set our schedules in accord. When we finally got the chance, our shoots were very much learning experiences in what does not work for under water photography. The water does funny things to light, movement, and colors. We knew this and were actually counting on it both as a challenge and as a hearty helping of "Ooh that looks nice." Not many of these came out as workable images. In my editing I tried to highlight or exaggerate what I liked about them. So, the amount of photoshop used may cause nausea in anyone reading this who feels as tho an image should be left alone. We've worked together many times since and on several ideas. Each session continues to be a learning experience. It's really the process and the company I'm after tho. A few of my favorite images have been from a session when he came out to the new apartment the Boy and I are currently living in. Before we moved any furniture in; the place needed a photo shoot. I am in love with the deep windowsills. (as were the cats) I swear I'm not exaggerating when I say they're a little over a foot deep. We've got em covered in plastic and heavily draped now with the -10 F degree weather and snow.



He has opened his house to myself and the boy many times. His adorable corgi seems to enjoy our visits as much as we do. He knows how to melt a girls heart that dog. This last shot was from a really crack of dawn early day. (Which gave us gorgeous light.) I had gone out there to meet another photographer and it worked out that they both shot me in a field. (lolz) I tried to focus on doing things with my hands and arms that shoot. I'll have more from it up later.



Ok I lied that wasn't the last image. This one, from our last shoot is it I swear.

All images in this post were taken by and are Copy Write owned by: Life Is Great Images
Editing was by myself, blueriverdream except for that very last one there.

A Mess

Things are a bit of a mess at the moment. Both here, in the new house, figuratively, and literally. Nothing too bad; Just a little disarray.

A lot's been going on since we got back from our trips. We moved. There was no internet for a little bit. Lots of cleaning and shopping, and packing and unpacking. We got a lovely comfy gorgeous new mattress set. Queen, individual pocket springs, memory foam top, new pillows, good deal. (I've discovered that my pillow complex is because I'm a "side-sleeper") The whole thing was a combined gift too. We've mostly furnished the new place, just in need of a sofa/couch/futon/thing now. There's nowhere for people to sit other than our two computer chairs and the 3 kitchen chairs and the two camp chairs.

So online the mess is I've moved the blog, and changed names. Photos will be back in a little bit I have to re-upload them. I'm also working of doing some serious photo sorting done for the website project and you know just so I can look at my photos. Giving Lightroom a try. This may require a couple new hard drives and a RAM upgrade though.

Nonsense

So things are back to normal around here. Sorta.

We've been off on adventures. We had a wedding to attend in Scotland and to get there and back again took some crazy travel scheduling. We traveled straight for 4 days. Did a shoot in NY during our stop over/ airport switch there. Had nearly every single flight as a red-eye. Stayed in a Hostel in London. Which in many ways was a highlight of the trip. I would highly recommend it to anyone between the ages or 18-35. It's the Astor Victoria and from talking to the fellow travelers there, is one of the cheapest true hostels left. Everything is self service, which in our age and budget bracket is awesome because it means you're not paying for services you either won't be utilizing or don't need.

The wedding was near Inverness, on Loch Ness in the Urquhart Castle ruins. It was a traditional Scottish wedding, sorta. Traditional in attire with kilts and sporans on the men. Other than that I've no idea how much of the form was formality for tradition or formality to show off. The bride's father was a professional wedding photographer. So of course, he did the whole thing himself. I was in awe of the bride. I'd been to weddings before, and met her before. But she was just astoundingly radiant. Lucky groom.


We had some weirdness with our flights so ended up on a 14 hour bus ride back down to London. There was a very, very short visit with my godfather and his family. Too short. But really good to meet the girls.

Then back to the States. We visited in VA for a few days. I ran around a bit with a couple friends and my brother. (all separate) I did manage to steal off into the woods of a park in the neighborhood I used to live in for a few photos.There was good drinks that day as well! And kittens! And an X-files commercial! And Rob and I need more shooting time. Definitely! And port!

Came back to the cats and work for a few days then ran off to Yellowstone. But that's another story. I need to post this otherwise it will never see light of day.

Trips

I will be using this image on the "splash" page for the future web-site. (one day it will exist, along with my coat project, and box-lamp, and various other ongoing projects .) I love it. .
Todd Brown in Portland was very generous with his hospitality on our trip through Oregon. Also, since people seem to note these things, and I definitely noticed, he has an excellent and healthily eclectic taste in music. This one was from the same shoot, no I wasn't dancing here. These two seem to me to go well together as a diptych. Movement is something I enjoy seeing explored photographically. Mostly because its a little paradoxical.
I was reminded of this trip because it was last years "big adventure." The boy and I are about to embark on this years big adventure this coming Saturday. Wish us luck and great fun. I won't tell too much of the plans because then expectations may arise. But... there may some really cool stuff happening... We are NOT going to Rome. We are NOT getting married. I am NOT quitting my job. (tho I found out today that many folks at work thought that one or all of the above were the case. ) There is a wedding, in Scotland. For his cousin, fancy stuff.

Now for a dinosaur photo straight outta my camera from our recent venture in the Museum of the Rockies. Cool place. I think I'll post some of my own snaps and photos in here as well.
And the outside:

Some overdue business in the nude area

So, I never did kick-start this blog thing. I've got several unposted half entries. Since I'm kinda of aiming to keep this modeling or at least photography oriented, I should post some images right? Problem is I don't know where to start. I figured maybe the beginning?

In a past life I was a waitress. I discovered that a coworker was also a hobbyist photographer, tho our subject matter and angles of approach were very different. I was coming from a dark-room oriented art student mentality. The process and power of photography captivated (still does) me. He was coming from an entirely self-taught point- and-shoot angle. Eventually we developed a friendship which carried over to me modeling for him. I had posed nude for "photo sets" before. But these were the type hidden on an unmarked floppy away from moms. This was something with artistic merit, a creative goal, and technically my first couple shoots weren't nude at all, but they lead up to it. I'm going to post images here that haven't seen light on my other web hangouts. (DeviantArt and MM) All are by that first photographer and continued friend, Nihilus.

Crunchyroll - how to get your Asian fix

So like any good druggie, I am constantly in search of a reliable source. And like any drug the good stuff is rarely legal. When it is it probably shouldn't be. I jones after all things Asian.

I confess. I have an addiction.

Today while doing my usual search on IMDB (new horror movie coming out this summer didn't I see that in Korean or Japanese a few years back?) I'm sure ya'll have heard of J-horror due to the whole Ring franchise. Well Korea does horror better, more subtle. K-horror: next in the alphabet of horror to be remade for American audiences. The search I do is a wikipedia style following of links. From directors and producers, to writers, to actors; I search for movies that I might be interested in. It sucks doing this on IMDB because unless it was a HUGE hit then their info is limited and incomplete. Rarely do they have trailers or plot descriptions. Then when I find something promising I go to YouTube and search for a trailer. Then if I find a trailer and it still sounds good I go to the Piratebay and search for a torrent.

Netflix would be good too I bet. I don't like their endless strings attached deal. I like to be able to watch a movie on my time under my own supervision.

Right so if I find a torrent with English subs then I download it. After one day to a week I get to watch my movie, depending on seeders. (I don't care about dubs, I need to read lips or text and foreign languages rule out lips. Plus the dialog blends into the music sooo much better when I don't have to filter out words. )

Bleh this sucks.

Today I found Crunchyroll. http://www.crunchyroll.com/

They are awesome. It's basically like YouTube minus the personal crap. It streams live. I get to watch my movies, anime, whatever now! All subed (so far). It really makes the "Otaku" in me happy. And if you're looking for something then their wiki is great. It's Wikiroll http://wiki.crunchyroll.com/Main_Page Here it's like a database of everything on the main site. Pick from Anime, Drama, Music, ect. then pick your country of interest. The rest is alphabetical.

If you wanna see things Big, or in a higher quality you gotta donate. I think it's way worth it. I found several movies I've wanted to re-watch, and a whole slew of horror to get jumpy with.

Since the shut down of so many anime torrent sites and then TVlinks.uk (same week as Oinks pink palace r.i.p.), this is the best thing since shrimp chips and mochi.

Nude but not Erotic

I model on occasion, usually nude. I like to think that it's artistic and tasteful. I certainly consider the photographers I work with to be artists.
I know that nudity equals boobs and that almost all of the photographers I've worked with are male. I know that I'm attractive, and that me being naked is usually a good thing. The boy and I joke that I make the world a happier place when I do this. I know that by posting my photos on the internet I may receive extra attention from sources I'd rather not know about.

So, all that said, why do I "model"? On my MM profile I say that, "I am interested in art, especially photography, as a process." It is fun, most of the time. I do like to get out there and try new things, have adventures, and meet new people. I'm finding that it is challenging too.

I'm learning about myself. I'm learning about my limits, my boundaries, and my discomforts. I'm learning what I like; how I like to be seen and what I want to show of myself. I'm finding that these are not always things that you can just know. I can make a list of things that "I'll never do" (like porn) but what about those in between bits (like erotic nudes or fetishes)? While I'm confident in my ability to say No and recognize situations that could become dangerous, safety and comfort are two (almost) totally different things. I've always believed that we don't truly know our personal boundaries until they have been crossed. Time after time I have found this to be true, not just for myself but from other models, even photographers. It's a very personal experience to find what you are comfortable with and capable of. I think it's called growing up.

Anyways, I like being nude i don't think that will ever get old even as I do. This goes way beyond photography and modeling. These just provide opportunity. For me it's not about seeing how these people see me. I haven't really cared about that in a long time. Its about the creating, the being a part of the photos. My favorite shoots are the more experimental ones. Where myself and the photographer are trying something "new." These tend to be technically challenging, rarely produce many "good" images, and involve me getting cold, wet, or both. It's a lot of fun! Fun with lights, LEDs, EL wire, dry ice, paints, liquid latex, water, underwater, jam, feathers, fabric, fans, new cameras, old camera, film experiments: I love it! Not all aspects of a shoot are always planned out, but I usually get a pretty good idea of what to expect and what I'll be asked to do.

I'm not big on me and sexy. I mean I understand that I can look sexy, in and out of photos. But it's not something I work on. Sexy requires a certain desire to seduce. I'm not seductive, attractive maybe, but not actively trying to seduce. This is compounded by a thing with my eyes where they don't work quite right. I can not (believe me I've tried) stare down the camera, or the guy behind the camera. Doesn't even work for the guy in my bed. Also, I don't find modeling to be a turn on in any way. Just, no. So when I am asked to "do something erotic" during a shoot, it doesn't exactly go over very well.

Because I am most eager to pose nude "erotic" comes up a lot. I am most comfortable in front of a camera nude. I am most uncomfortable in front of a camera immediately after being asked to strike an erotic pose. I have actually gotten angry with a photographer who would not move on with the shoot after I made it quite plain to him, (in my mind) that he was not going to get erotic out of me. I do not equate nude with erotic and I dislike that term being thrown at me in the middle of a shoot.

If afterwards the photographer or anyone else looking at/over the photos comments on a particular image or set being "erotic" that is fine. The difference is this is a reaction to the images, not something I was actively seeking to elicit at the time of the photo being taken. I am comfortable with honesty and if I can't be totally honest with myself and everyone involved, I lose focus and then interest in a shoot. I may even not decide not to shoot with that photographer again depending on the context and and my level of discomfort at being asked for "erotic."

I realize many people photographers and even models will go, " what? that makes no sense woman! Do you realize how many doors you have just slammed? Or how little sense you make?"
Yeah I kinda do. I'm not saying I won't do erotic images, I have and will continue to in the future I'm sure. It's just that I am not comfortable with the goal of eroticism in a photo shoot. I do not equate being nude with being erotic.

First Post

Ok let's see how this goes. I'm starting a blog to go along with a website that I have in the works. This site, being a project/experiment will take a while. In the mean time, I think I can accomplish most everything a personal website used to be for in blog format.

So what am I going to do here?

Mostly rant and rave.
I'll use this space as a place to avoid forum postings and to save my fiance's ears. (He's kinda sick of hearing about the stupid people and says that it's depressing when I read the news aloud.)
When I find something cool I'll post it here (for posterity.)

I've also noticed that I like reading peoples blog's and sometimes I want to respond to their posts with a full blown rant myself.

Sometimes I'll post photos. Me. Naked. Fuzzy. Cute. Rarely with more than two of those as descriptives.

I don't really know what I'll do, so don't get your expectations all expected.